Monday, January 02, 2012

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


This time last week I was in Mexico wondering if/when the hurricane would hit. Would we be OK, would people die, would there be serious damage to areas it went through. I lay in bed that night praying for protection, for my family, for the people in the path of the hurricane. It scared me.

Mexico was definitely a new experience; the people, food, culture, sights and sounds, wildlife. It was so different from where I grew up or where I live now.

And there was one thing that really moved me when I was there; the last evening Lindsay and I went out for dinner down at the marina and while we were eating I saw a woman in front of the restaurant obviously selling homemade touristy knick knacks. She looked about my age and had 2 small children with her, I'm guessing a 3 yr old and a 5 yr old. So it's early evening and this is something she needs to do to make ends meet. I can't imagine having to do that, at the end of a tiring day with 2 small children, go out and earn some more money WITH MY KIDS. It made me think about how rich we are in Canada and the UK.

I know I am rich because I have the luxury of a roof over my head, food in my cupboard and clean water to drink.

Thursday, September 08, 2011

No Regrets, Who We Are.

OK, I really want to make a few things clear. Be prepared for a rant. And for this to be a little random.

I believe that Jesus is the Christ, that he is the Messiah. He is my best friend. I know he loves me, I am grateful that he loves me, warts and all. Depression and all.

There is something that has been bugging me for a while now, that I find it hard to voice.

Depression, the huge, big, fat, elephant in the room for many people.

Now, as most of my friends and acquaintances know, I am not scared to share with people about my struggle with depression. It's an illness I have. Plus sometimes I let my mouth run away with itself and don't know when to shut it;-)

What is beginning to irk me more and more is the attitude people have about depression and mental health. I'm sick of it being a taboo in Christian circles, like it's a dirty secret to ignore. My heart is sore that there are people who are ashamed of asking for help from their Christian community because they've been told it is 'sinful' to have this issue. It makes me down right angry that people are made to feel guilty for having an illness.

Something inside me isn't wired right. Sometimes I have an emotional breakdown. That's where the Dr comes in, part of the treatment I need is medication. Medication that helps fix my 'wiring' problem. Lots of people take daily medication for many different illnesses. No one thinks any less of someone who is a diabetic or asthmatic, why then look differently at someone with depression?

Depression can be debilitating. It can emotionally paralyze you. I have had days when getting in the shower has been such an overwhelming task that I've been a huddled mess of a ball in my bed. I don't need anyone else to make me feel bad about myself, I beat myself up enough thank you.

I am grateful that God's grace covers me. I am glad that He knows that my faith in Him is not in question. When I am in my darkest place, I have a best friend that holds me close and carries me through the raging storm. When lies are yelling in my head I hear a still small voice telling me truth. When I question my worth, God blesses me with people who reveal my treasure.

My heart breaks for the people who have to hide their illness, that are forced by others to wear a mask.

When depression is hidden, ignored, made to be something shameful... it aggravates the problem. When it is accepted, faced, dealt with.... that's when healing can happen. That's when you can learn to live with it, when you can live your life to the full , when depression is still an issue but not something that dictates your entire life.

'Every breath you take, every day you wake up, in this danger zone, put your war face on. Future I hear you calling, I'm on my way I'm running. There's no stopping me, it's in my heart, it's in my soul.
Listen to the things they say, turn the other cheek and hold faith, you know that I promise brighter days will come. Even when they try to hurt you, keep your head up and walk through, the future is on you, it's on you. No regrets, no holds barred, NO HOLDING BACK FROM WHO WE ARE. Though they try and break us, this is our wake up, who we are, who we are.'
No Regrets (Who We Are) - City Boy Soul.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Fathers Day

Nate was so proud of himself for making this frame for Lindsay. And I was very proud of him because he drew a picture of 'Daddy & Me', including bodies (up to now it's just been faces).

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Simple pleasures

This mornings simple pleasure is listening to my husband and son having goofy time together. It gives me a warm, mushy feeling.

Saturday, June 11, 2011


Me: Don't you mean Kaboom?

Friday, June 10, 2011


After chatting with a good friend this afternoon I am persuaded to try and get back in to my blogging. I guess as a form of journal for myself and for others.
Hmm, where to start...

We went to the zoo on Tuesday with Beth & Grace;Nate & Grace watching the goslings.

Good buddies.

The sign says it all

I'm watching you.

Today was a fun day. Nate & I went to have a play date with friends, so we hung out at their house for a bit, had some lunch then went to the spray park.And of course his hat and shorts were SOAKING WET.

Take note of the heart on the pocket of Nate's shorts... or the shorts that he borrowed from Liliana;-)

I have to say that my friends little girl, Liliana, and Nate are cut from the same cloth. They are extremely alike, Jen, her mum, totally agrees with me. So we commiserate and laugh together about our crazy, intelligent, busy, adorable, drive-us-insane, children.

As I've said many times before, I love the summer. It always improves my state of mind, all that wonderful vitamin D, not being cooped up inside all day, and the fact that I don't need a million layers just to step outside my front door makes me an extremely happier person. Images like this;

and this;
and this;

make me smile.